A new life....

We each begin life as a new born babe, swaddled in the safe arms of our mother. As a mother I have looked at my children in awe and wonder, to me they seem like three miracles of life. It is hard to imagine my life without them, they all have burst forward grabbing onto to life with such personality and exuberance, wisdom and love that I am blessed to call myself their mother.  I can remember the day each was born , such joy and love overwhelmed my soul its hard to put into words for you to read. Even as I sit here its hard not to be overwhelmed with my love for my three miracles of life, for that is what each child is a miracle to the lives that they are on this life to touch.  So I am going to share a story with you of one of my angel's births. My beautiful and only daughter, not because she is my favorite but because she was my first...

My Story....

I was 18 when I met and fell in love with a boy, for in essence isn't that where all birth stories begin. This boy it would turn out would be the love of my life, my best friend , my companion, and the future father of my children. We rushed our selves into marriage, as impulsive teenagers do, much to the dismay of our parents . Thinking ourselves adults already since we both had made the brave decision to join the service. Well shall we fast forward just 11months after marriage , I found myself following my now soldier husband and I am 9 months pregnant and out the service. Stationed 1100 miles away from home and any family support.  As most soldiers do he has been to training in and out on field exercises for the better part of two months. I was often alone and yes afraid that any day the baby would come and he would be off training and possibly miss the whole event. Yes, scared was an accurate description of what I felt a lot of days . April 1, he calls from the company to say he is on his way home me thinking its April Fool's Day tell him please don't play it's not a funny trick. Jubilation! Relief! He is home, if only for a few days he is still there.  My labor began at around 2:30am, I woke up in shock and pain. I cant say that I remember exactly how great the pain was I just know that I felt pain.  I didn't know what was happening, I was 19 how could I know what was happening. My husband,  wakes up to me moaning on all fours rocking next to the bed. He, thankfully was in a better frame of mind than I was because he immediately called the hospital, who verified that they thought I was labor. After that I just remember him saying that I needed to get off the floor, he didn't want the baby to born on the floor( I still chuckle when I think on that) . I just wanted to rock, I do not know how I knew but somehow I just did that me rocking in that position would be the best for me and it would ease my pain. When we finally got to the hospital, I remember being asked what was my pain management plan and all I could think was give me whatever you got back there. I was checked and the nurse told me that I was too far along in my labor to receive in any drugs.  This is the  part that is not my memory but of my husband's.... According to him I was able to manage some of the pain by biting down, I wanted to bite the bed,  anything, he again  thought that it wasn't clean enough( in a hospital not clean enough I don't think I cared too much .. o.K!)  So he gives me his hand to bear down and as he is falling asleep next to me all he feels is me biting into his hand.  OK, I will admit I don't remember doing that but after that he says he gave me the big pack of gum he had and told me to bite down on that.  When our son was being born he refused to hold my hand or come near my head, he said he wasn't going to lose his finger because I couldn't control my animal urges.  Aside from the biting,  my daughter came into the world almost 6 hours after I woke up initially in labor without any incident. At 8:04am we welcomed, our daughter into the world. The doctor who attended  my birth and during this time at the hospital I was at, had a tradition of letting the father of the child deliver the baby during the last moment , as long as there were no complications. Well needless to say my husband, glove less and all delivered his daughter and was the one to place her on my chest during her first moments of life.  I still remember the look of joy on his face, mixed in with disgust, childbirth is not a pretty or clean business.  Our daughter was beautiful in all of her 8lbs 4oz glory, curly hair  who personality matches her dad's.

There are many reasons this story  touches me  one at the point my daughter was born she was actually 5 days overdue, I had  spent so many nights praying that she would not be born while I was by myself I lost count, I think I made my prayer a mediation chant. She was actually born  two days before her father's birthday, and even now they celebrate together.  Even though I was scared much of the time during my pregnancy, not sure what was going to be the outcome. The minute she was born everything came into focus and I was centered. Every birthing experience is different but if they all were exactly the same, life would have no color and uniqueness. My child was delivered into the hands of her father and immediately given to me.

Brazilian Birthing Experiences vs. My Birthing Experience

In Brazil the birthing experiences for women may seem very similar on the surface. However in the references that I have found give birth in a hospital setting such as I did. On one website it is mentioned that many doctors find it convenient to schedule c-sections or Cesarean section, when births do not happen according to their plan. In many cases only one relative and not husband are allowed in the Labor and Delivery RM. In another article women seemed to have a high value in their ability to maintain self-control. Finding that their positions during labor helped or weakened their feelings of control. They believed that good self-control contributed to a good birthing experience.

In comparison when giving birth in the US, I will go into further detail I was on a military installation at the time. Yes, I was in a hospital assisted by a Nurse Practitioner and a Doctor,  I believe both were soldiers. I was given as close to a natural birthing experience as possible.  A C-section, was never even mentioned. My husband was not only in the room as my coach but he was an integral part of the whole birth. I'm sure if complications had come up I would have been writing a very different story, but again I know that my husband would still be a part of it.

Where both countries have a similarities and I would venture to guess all women have a similarity is our ability to maintain control during the process of giving birth. Not to control the birth itself, a baby will come when it comes, but to maintain control over our emotions and become brave when we may be unbelievably afraid. To suddenly find strength when we are tired beyond all reasonable imagination. To push new life, with that last ounce of strength we have in our being because deep in our souls we know this is our meaning in life.


http://www.biomedcentral.com/1471-2393/13/171
http://www.gringoes.com/articles.asp?ID_Noticia=365