Mircoagressions

 I would always state that for most of my life that I have been able to state that I have not been the victim of overt acts of discriminations. I would say this is due to the fact that I find myself apart of many major groups within our culture. However the subtle acts of discriminations that may have been hard to detect in the past yet have come to the forefront of my thoughts through my studies this week.

One such moment of micro aggression that I have experienced happened to me in the past, as the wife of a soldier I am often left to handle many of my families day -to -day needs in the absence of my husband. Decisions can not be left until he can be consulted or has the time in order to handle things. I say this because I have found myself learning new skills and researching on concepts that I would have found boring in the past in an effort to keep our family life moving along on a more or less smooth pace.

It was during one of my husbands deployments that I found myself faced with the attitudes that some may feel that  I am in capable of making decisions or having knowledge in areas most people would assume have been handled in the past by husband. It was during this time that I realized the surprise some people expressed to me that during each of my husband's deployments I have made a conscious decision as so many military wives make to stay near the military base instead of relocating to be closer to my family.  Its odd to think of this now because at the time I simply shrugged the comments off and paid no attention to them at all, however now in light of my studies on microagressions these comments were made in the opinion that I was less capable of leading my life without my husband being there and that I would automatically revert to going home in order to find support for myself and my children. This is not to say that the decisions that I made were easy , they just were the best decisions to make under the circumstances that I found myself, in which I always placed the need for my children to have stability in their lives above my own discomfort.

In thinking of the subtle ways that we can affect how others view us and themselves. It is important to have an awareness of the subtle ways in which we can impose our beliefs and biases on those around us. In my case I know that I was faced with moments of doubt as if I was less capable of carrying on in my husband's absence. These were hard feelings in which to put behind me and in the end I chose to focus on the day to day happenings in my life and not on my ability or inability to handle my current situation. For other people the solution may not be so simple.

Definitions of Culture

In speaking with several people about their definitions of diversity and culture.  For the most part their definition of culture includes how a person in raised by their parents or caregivers.  Culture also includes the environment in which a person or  group finds themselves are influences on a  persons sense of culture.  For example one person may have been raised in a middle-class family in a big city. While another person is raised in lower middle class family living in a more rural setting.

            Diversity is defined as the differences that are seen between people.  It was further concluded our reactions to these differences or our adapting to include these differences as positive experiences enables our acceptance of these diversities.

            In reflecting upon the answers I received about culture and diversity, everyone included the environment in which a person is exposed to including references to the implied housing arrangements and economic status.  All are implications of the deep culture in which everyone  takes a part.

Yet there were omissions of ideas of food, holidays and  as well as the place that familial relationships have in our culture.

            In speaking to my friends about culture and diversity I am struck by the lack of emphasis on what on the surface is included in thoughts of our culture. In culture talks of food, music, styles of clothing and the influences of those in power and fame all influence our culture. Yet no one mentioned any of this in his or her own definition of culture. In thinking of how others view culture I am beginning to contemplate the lack of focus on the details that influence our culture and the culture of others are seen.